The big challenge and strength of any relationship can be judged after the lovy dovy honeymoon phase gets over. As many believe and suggest its a stage where everything is full of grand gestures, where the eyes and the mind stopped working against any negative thing related to other, where being with that special one means everything, where you can go to any extent to make them happy and the list can go on and on. But the truth is the further we go, the harder it is.
Honeymoon phase generally lasts between 6 months to 2 years. It can extend for long also which depends. In every generation there are couples who stays strong, full of love and care and true to each other. One thing which every relationship need is constant effort and continuous growing. The day you stop that exact day your relation will jump out of the window.
To make things better both the partners need to acknowledge and accept some basic facts.
Is Your Honeymoon Phase Over?
1. Fights & arguments are natural and does not end anything
Just imagine one day you are going somewhere and suddenly, after some drama your car stopped. Now you have nowhere to go and no one is there to help you. You spend rest of the day and night at that very place and next morning with heavy heart when you try again it roars up and starts. Now the question is what will you do? Sell the car or try to rectify the problem area? You guessed it so right. (Not many does that anyways)
Just because you got some problems doesn’t mean the entire relation was based on fake feelings. It takes every ounce of blood and sweat to make things works. You have full right to disagree and react as two different individuals can never think in a same way. Have you noticed two kids from the same mother are also different.
Just keep a check on the regular no point on everything fights as they are the ones which gives you the first sign that things are not as they were at one point and in this case either solve things out or choose a right time to end the misery.
2. You both have family
Family is like your backbone, you grew with them, spend a lot of time near them and they are important to every individual. Right? As mentioned earlier not everyone can get along very well with everyone but assuming things before they actually happens is a wrong way to face them. Your primary motive is to put in your effort and nothing else. You cannot control the word or actions or thoughts of any other person rather than your own self. When you want to treat his/her family bad just think you too got one.
3. Relationships do get stale
Once you spend considerate amount of time with someone day and night, its natural to fall in some kind of routine. And that’s why its important to talk to your partner and try to introduce new things. This is your relation and you only have to take initiative to make things right. No one is coming to make things right. Nobody likes same old routines or things.
4. Try to be punctual
Just because you crossed the honeymoon phase doesn’t mean that you can be late and leave your partner standing and waiting like an idiot. If they can be on time you to can be. There are no reasons for such things. Try to keep in mind some unforeseen events too which will help you be on time. Your reason of being late no matter how genuine can still cause some unnecessary tension and can spoil your entire meeting .
5. Don’t stop the little things
If you are crossing some shop where you saw their favorite thing just go for it. Don’t think about it. Little gestures built relations in a special way which showcase that you don’t need only special occasions to honor the presence of your partner in your life.
6. Compromises are not the end of freedom
Its not necessary every time that you agree with your partner about what he/she wants you to do but if its important and matter to your partner than acting on his/her happiness is not a big thing. Keep in mind its like a return gift which will come to you at some point of time. Plus its about making other happy.
Don’t hung over it by picking issues which makes no sense. If you do something than it won’t cost you your freedom.When you are in relationship you cant stay selfish and its never only about you. Its about two people who acts to make things work to live a better future.
7. Do not react on everything
Words are amazing and not every time people will take them in a way you said them. So try to see what other actually means before you react over something which means nothing. Or better ask yourself does this argument will lead to something better or important?
8. Don’t let things die down
Once the honeymoon phase is over few things fade away. Intimacy, romance, care. They should increase and if not then talk to your partner about it and clear things out. Crossing honeymoon phase itself is a sign that things were amazing between the two of you, so try making out what changed? Things have to be balanced on emotional and physical level else the relationship wont sustain any further.
9. Attention should be constant
Humans have a tendency that once you spend ample amount of time together the importance of other person decreases. Now you plan your own fun things, meet and plan more outings with your friends or do things on your own without even informing or consulting with other. Talking to your partner about what you want to do won’t make you any less. Relationships means togetherness. You are not alone to act as single and once you feel that ways than their is no point staying in a relation. Then don’t make it difficult for both of you and move ahead. Every time to feel like as a single person ask yourself is anything more important than my own partner?
10. Respect decisions
At one point you compelled to do things for your partner on your own without they even asking for it. Now they have to fight for that. Why? Nothing changed if you focus on the things. Try respecting their decisions if they respects your’s. You cant just keep on getting everything as you want and won’t do anything in return. Than its not a relation you are into. You are being selfish as hell.
11. Final words
Can you remember what all you did when you guys just got together? So much fun, so much care, so much love and togetherness. You guys are were a team, partners in crime, strong companions to take on this world together. Everything can come back when you choose to see that you are just crossing one phase and sometimes things do lose their charm which happens as we are humans. Accept the changes and look for better ways to grow out of it rather than starting another relation or running away. As in the end you again have to cross this phase with someone new and things won’t be better with them, they will remain the same.
No matter what happen don’t lose sight of the foundation you built for your relation and why you guys got together. Pity things need to be sacrificed and constant love has to be boosted to make this machinery work. Hold tight hang on…
Make time for each other, start a fresh, forget and forgive and move on with the loved one to make things better and beautiful than they were. Nothing lost only a phase and THIS TOO SHALL PASS…
Value the promises and commitments you have made above all else, and just like the two of you everything will come together in a peaceful way.